500 Things NOT to do in Yu-Gi-Oh! (all generations)
by Hope Hoshiko
Summary: The title is pretty self-explanatory...but this is for ALL generations. It's not too good because of my poor sense of humor... But anyway, I'm looking for suggestions! Let's reach 500, shall we?


****Okay, decided to start a new project. I'm a big procrastinator, I know, I know… But I need to write something humorous now and then (if you call this attempt even close to funny). I'm still working on Sacred Sacrifices, but I'll be doing this too while high school and color guard keep me busy! Inspired by 1000 Things to NOT do in Panem (it's hysterical, go read it, Hunger Games fans)!**

**DISCLAIMER: I own none of the Yu Gi Oh! Characters or any of that.**

**Well, as I say, I give you: Part One of 500 Things NOT to do in Yu-Gi-Oh! *****

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I was bored. Had nothing to do. Just listening to a lecture…nothing big. So I decided to make a list to chase away my worries…

Okay, whatever you do, DON'T do these things to Yu-Gi-Oh! Characters…or conventions…or anything associated with it…:

1. Make fun of grown men who play children's card games on motorcycles

2. Show the Yu-Gi-Oh! Characters (all generations) the manga for Yu-Gi-Oh! (depends…)…

3. Or just show any of the Yu-Gi-Oh! Characters YGO Abridged

4. Call Akiza the Wicked Witch of the West

-although it makes no sense

5. Tell Jaden that his hair is in the discreet shape of a _flattened_ Kuriboh

6. Reference Lazar with Ronald McDonald

-though they look nothing alike

7. Ship Yu-Gi-Oh cards with other characters or monster cards

8. Try to make Pokemon and Yu-Gi-Oh alike

-good luck with that…

9. Introduce Ash Ketchum to Yugi

10. Make Ash and Yugi duel/battle with Pokemon and Monster cards

11. Ship Yusei with his Duel Runner

-that's already been done…by Blister…_technically_

12. Host a Ramen eating contest with Crow, Jack, and Naruto

13. Look at Luna's diary

14. Show Joey "Nyeh Cat"

15. Let Jack handle an unplugged microphone

-and assume that the explosion of Ener-D was because of him

16. Put Evil Tristan on a motorcycle

17. Tell Kaiba about the infamous "Screw the rules I have money" quote

-he might agree with you

18. Duel a supercomputer

-especially if it relies on pure probability

19. Beat the crap out of Rex Goodwin's guards

-Again, has been already done by Yusei

20. Blast Nyan Cat in Jack's ear

21. Tease Sherry in French

22. Note how Yugi's hair is three times the size of Kaiba's ego

23. Call Crow an "orange-haired dodo"

24. Introduce Yugi to Trudge…

-though they may not remember each other that well, Trudge _IS_ Ushio…

25. Show any of the male characters in the whole Yu-Gi-Oh! My Little Pony

-Most of them might disapprove…

26. Duel in Yusei's apartment

-Unless you wanna tick Zora off with the loud sounds during her soap operas…

27. Give Astral a math lesson

28. Reference Yuma as a Super Saiyan

29. Call out randomly at a Yu-Gi-Oh Live convention "Card games FOR THE WIN!"

30. Randomly ask about how Jack clearly looks American(?) and yet has a _thick _Australian accent

-I humbly apologize for being racist in any way

31. Scream "CARD GAMES ON MOTORCYCLES!" at the top of your lungs when you see two motorcyclists on a freeway

32. Kidnap Yusei…without his Duel Runner

-Now he won't be amused…

33. Produce Sayer-flavored treats for Earthbound Immortals

-Martha-flavor is just plain HEARTLESS

34. Show the Duelists how to duel…with actual _weapons_

-Now that would be…violently interesting.

35. Look at the background setting in Crash Town; automatically see "The Classy Ass" in one of the buildings…

-No I'm serious I forgot which episode but in one of the buildings when it has a shot of Yusei there is a building behind him with "The Classy Ass" on it…

36. Tell Crow that he has a *dragon/dinosaur for a younger brother…

(_Yoshi_ Hogan)

37. Force Jack to get high on coffee

38. Make _VERY_ inappropriate Yaoi references to the anime…

39. Cut Yugi's hair

40. …or Jaden's…

41. or Yuma's…

42. Reference the Hunger Games to Yu-Gi-Oh! ZEXAL because of their weird hairstyles…

-"I can totally see their hairstyles being the Capital's newest fads!" Ha ha, no.

43. Interrupt Tea's friendship speeches

44. Get swallowed by an Earthbound Immortal

45. Die in the Ener-D incident…

-unless you're born with bad luck

46. Kill puppies using Kaiba's smile

47. Try grouping all of the characters in all generations in Divergent Factions

48. Get stuck in a virtual reality dueling game (that's not reality) that sucks away your soul if you lose a children's card game…

49. Stick your hand with your cards in the air while driving a Duel Runner

-the cards might fly off. Yusei would always stick his hand horizontally while driving. Sometimes anime can fail to realize the laws of physics and gravity… [Fires of Black Chaos]

50. Chain Mystical Space Typhoon with anything [Fires of Black Chaos]

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*****Okay, so again, I've never done this before, so you might not find this very funny. Can I improve this? If so, then please drop a review or PM!**

***Yoshi is technically a dragon in my perspective, but to be fair, I put dragon/dinosaur. No bickering, please. ;) (That means you!) *****


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